Refugee Work Through The Eyes of An Intern

by: Amanda Stephenson

I remember being in a car with my family several years ago, on another of many long drives.  As usual I was restless and uncomfortable, and at the impatient age of ten years the occasion was sure to cause much complaining.  As one of a long string of grumbles, I whined exasperatingly to my parents, “I’m hungry!”  My father turned around and calmly informed me that I was actually not hungry, and in fact I had never been hungry and could not conceive of the feeling of hunger no matter how hard I tried.  I was pacified into a confused silence for the next ten minutes, as I stared out of the window searching for a glimpse of the Statue of Liberty.

Ten years later, during the summer after my first year of college, I was fortunate enough to have the opportunity to work at the International Service Center.  This experience opened my eyes to many situations that I had never considered before, and has allowed me to begin to appreciate how lucky I have been.  I could just have easily been born in a war-torn country and led an entirely different life.  Although I probably would have turned out to be a much stronger person had I encountered these situations and survived, I believe that I am very lucky to have been born in a safe and stable situation.

Nevertheless, during my time at the ISC I have also seen that the United States has many imperfections.  Although living as an American has afforded me many privileges and opportunities for which I am very grateful, this country as a whole is not nearly so gracious a host to the people who are truly in need and come here seeking refuge.  Inscribed in the base of the Statue of Liberty are Emma Lazarus’ words: “Give me your tired, you poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore.  Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”  These words are inspirational in spirit, and would be even more so if put into practice.  Although the United States is a nation of immigrants, we have historically been shamefully unwelcoming to those in need of asylum.  There are many who have had the opportunity to make a new home here, through teir own strength, persistence and hope.  However, for every family that builds a new life here, there are too many for which the doors are bolted shut.

Even after the lucky ones are allowed to enter this country, they are often not treated with the dignity that human beings deserve.  They come here with many talents and skills, but are not familiar with the American system and often do not know more than a few words of English.   The International Service Center is a unique organization because it utilizes what are among the most valuable abilities of the refugees that arrive in central Pennsylvania – their skills in linguistic and cultural interpretation.  For people who are disoriented in a strange place to be able to come into the ISC offices and speak with another person from their homeland, who can not only relate to their problems but can help them to navigate an unfamiliar system and direct them on the path towards self-sufficiency, is really a miracle that I feel lucky to have been a part of.

In the three months that I spent at the International Service Center, I met and worked with people who are incredibly strong.  I met parents who had been given a small room to live in with as many as eight children, and who earned less than a living wage to support their families.  After arriving in the United States, their new home, they had no choice but to try to navigate the system on their own; they were given nothing, and they managed to make the best of it.  Parents went without food or health care for the sake of their children.  Fortunately, after finding the ISC, these families learned that there are some options for assistance that could help them to achieve autonomy and the “American Dream.”  These people who managed to survive are ones with initiative and persistence, qualities which enable them to contribute immensely to our country.  As new Americans, they have shown me more by their hard work and diverse perspectives that I could ever appreciate.  From my experience, this country not only has the capability to help people in need, but we can learn a great deal from those people as well.

Community and Leadership (Part 1)

by:  Quan Cao

There is a place.  There is a time.  There once was a leader.  The leader is one of three elements.  Nevertheless, his/her role is tantamount in making things happen.  A leader gives 110% of self.  Most of use know that beyond our daily duties, we are on call the rest of the time.  Once we have decided to become a Mutual Assistance Association (MAA), once we have taken that position of a translator, we know our time is no longer ours, but the community’s.  In my opinion, there are nine different ways this 110% time can be allocated:

Leadership is 100% little, 10% big.  My mother would be making all the little decisions such as where the family lives, where the children to to school, if the family buys a new car, and my father would be making all the big decisions like if we should support the nuclear freeze or go to war against the Evil Empire.  Small is beautiful, and thousands of years ago, Confucius already warned us that one first learned how to rule a nation by taking care of one’s household. 

Leadership is 100% perspiration, 10% inspiration.  It is not enough for our MAAs to have a balanced budget and be prepared with a reserve fund.  We must have a prepared mission statement, a vision for the group.  Intelligence and talent are not enough.  It is the ability to “press on”, to generate, to do more because we care to do more.

Leadership is 100% science and 10% art.  It’s learning how to ride a bicycle, learning a new language, learning a new culture.  You practice, practice and practice, and then one day, it becomes second nature.  It is no longer technique.  Demosthenes, one of the world’s greatest orators, started out stuttering.  To overcome his handicap, he would put pebbles in his mouth and practiced screaming against the sound of the waves.  Greatness, contrary to popular belief, is not built on the ease of mastery, but on the sheer desire and ability to overcome a weakness.

Leadership is 100% mind, 10% heart.  How many of us have heard: When in Rome, do as the Romans do?  When I think of the Romans, I think of Pompeii.  I think of the rise and of the fall of that civilization.  It is of course only natural when you go into a new environment, to try to conform, to learn to adapt.  Yet, let us remind ourselves there is a price one pays for conformity, there is a price one pays for not fully understanding the extent of marginality and cultural loss.  You can take the boy out of the country, you’ll never take the country out of the boy.  We may have become hyphenated Americans.  let us not forget our cultural and linguistic heritage, because more than anything we have to offer our children, our community, and the American community, it is the spirit upon which this country was found, the spirit of the immigrant.

Leadership is 100% past and 10% future.  The past is important, the future is essential.  This is a point of cross-cultural conflict.  So often, generations clash because the values of the old country are no longer valid in a new environment, and the vicarious understanding of the young generation does not allow them the possibility to go through the rebellion loop to find their proper social niche.  By the same token, “old” leaders may have gone through their parenting experience and acquired the ability to reframe their knowledge and experience to be much more consensus based.  Our elders have always been natural helpers.  Our education and training have made some of us leaders, but we are artificial leaders.  After all, acculturation has reversed the nature of the extended family system.  Our children are now the teachers of the new culture, not our parents, not our grandparents.  I saw a sign in an office that sums up an American value base: “If you want to appear young, hang around old people”.  In our culture, it has always been the other way around.  If you want to appear old, hang around young people.  The point is old leaders were once young, and young leaders will also one day be old.  We have got to make the connection. 

Leadership is 100% risk, only 10% certainty.  We are dealing with a flexible, fluid quantity, human resources.  We are investing in people, and all of us have to learn not to overestimate, and never to underestimate the ability of the refugees to do for themselves.  As a counselor, I have learned that my client controls the therapeutic process much more than I am willing to admit.  change does come, but it only comes if and when the trust and faith has been built.  We need to leave room for all of us to make mistakes, to form value judgements if such is our need, to accept our mistakes and still allow us to take risks and to press on.

Leadership is 100% followership, 10% leadership.  To lead, one must first learn how to follow.  It is 100% listening, only 10% acting.  It is learning to listen, and learning to give others positive feedback, so the constructive criticism and the spirit within which it is given are not misconstrued as personality and power conflicts.

Finally, leadership is 100% pain, and only 10% ecstasy.  This is probably why women understand and appreciate true leadership much more easily than men.  Yet, something in me is stirred each time my wife tells me she wishes I can go through the experience of carrying a child for nine months.  I have always thought she carried our child for those nine months, but I have the nine years of adolescence to look forward to.  I guess men and women sometimes do have a different perspective on who leads in the family.  This certainly dispels an anthropological notion of most Asian societies as patriarchies.  I remember growing up, whenever I have a problem or a real decision issue, I would frequently confide in my mother or my grandmother.  That evening, they would astutely shared this information with either Father or Grandfather.  The decision will be formalized next morning by eldest male at the breakfast table.  Well, I guessed we have gotten the anthropologists fooled.

As we concentrate on the 100% product, let us be mindful of the 10% process.  Let us be mindful to be forgiving of self and of others, because within our cultural paradigms, we are not talking about the welfare and the mental health of an individual, but of a family and a community.  The role of the MAA’s leader is so important is sharing this good will.

The Vietnamese Filial Piety

by: ISC

Most traditional Vietnamese families have an ancestral altar placed in a prominent place in the main room of the house.  The ancestral altar is usually set with an incense burner, two candlesticks, a food tray, and the ancestral tablets, which in traditional households display the names of the past four generations.  The respect of ancestors shown in the rites performed before the ancestral altar affirmed the concept of the family as the never-ending continuation of all its members – deceased, living and yet to be born.

The cornerstone of the solid Vietnamese family structure is filial piety, or the children’s love for their parents and respect for their ancestors.

Of all creatures produced by God, man is the noblest.  Of all the actions of man, there is none greater than filial piety, so goes an ancient saying.  Filial piety is the practical duty of man.  It is the sign of affection and gratitude.  In fact, Vietnamese parents have heavy responsibilities toward their children.  Not only must they feed and care for their children, they must have also to prepare then for a adult life of honor and success.  They have to pay for their children’s education, watch their children’s behaviors very closely, and set examples of compassion, righteousness, propriety, industriousness, and loyalty.

In return, it is the filial duty of the children to serve their parents in the following ways:

In their general conduct to the parents, they must show respect.  In their are for the parents, they must try to give them the utmost satisfaction.  When the parents are ill, they must tenderly and lovingly nurse them until they pass away.  If punished by the parents, they must not allow themselves to complain.  When they are going somewhere, they must inform their parents.  When they return, they must present themselves before the parents.

In their work, the children must make their family name illustrious.  If what the children plan to do will disgrace the parents’ honor, they must resist that.  When the parents die, the children must pray for the salvation of their soul and complete there years of mourning, and then celebrate their death anniversary every year thereafter.  Top